MY DAYS

 WHEN I WAS YOUNG

Growing up as a child, I did not like many things. I liked to eat, I was not into gamming, but I loved playing football. I liked to ack, loved playing the Priest character, and also loved to sing.

Physically, I was strong, you would hardly catch me cry, was not afraid of seeing blood and just wanted to be strong. I would pump my chest whenever I had the opportunity to defend someone else who was bullied, cos I loved to stand up for those who were either afraid to do so, or just could not defend themselves.

THE CHALLENGE

As I recall, my challenges started when I became separated from my family, when I went to boarding school. I was probably just 10 years old or so, this was in 1992. As a coping mechanism, there was always someone who looked like someone I knew back home and that really got me connected back to home. I really did not like the school, I was bullied a lot and not long after, my once good grades started to head south. I recall pleading with my parents to take me out of the school; pleas that obviously fell on deaf ears. When my grades kept going worse, my dad washed his hands off my studies and not long after, I had to leave the school and came back home. The damage was done already at that time, I hated school and whatever it represented. This was my first traumatic experience and it was in these days I experienced what I now realized is called depression! I recall being ashamed and afraid of going outside, my love for the game was no longer there, I would lock myself inside the room, mostly because I feared I would be perceived weak and a failure.

I stopped making friends (not like I was big on this, cos in my neighborhood, you almost did not have a choice, we grew up as a community, but at this time, you had to select your click). Being locked indoors, i focused my time more around religion and reading, with particular interest in philosophy, trying to find a reason and meaning of life and to go on. I became angrier, but now more determined to turn my fortunes around and become successful. Put it this way, books and philosophy opened and broadened my mind! At this point I hated failure, I became secretive, stopped talking, was open to take more risk and became spontaneous.